Christmas crackers…..
Mon, Dec 12, 2011
In our latest newsletter we asked 10 festive jokes…here are the jokes again, with their punch lines, and with a bonus 5 extra jokes…..
1. What never eats at Christmas time? The turkey – it’s always stuffed!
2. What’s brown and tasty and sneaks around the kitchen? - Mince spies!
3. What’s the difference between a Christmas alphabet and an ordinary alphabet? – the Christmas alphabet has Noel!
4. Why did the duck cross the road in winter? – to quack open the ice!
5. What happened to the man who stole a calendar at Christmas? – he got 12 months!
6. What kind of candle burns longer at Christmas? – none of them: they all burn shorter!
7. Why is it always cold at Christmas? – because it’s Decemberrrrrrrr!
8. What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? – tinselitus!
9. What’s the best Christmas present ever? – a broken drum: you can’t beat it!
10. What goes “oh, oh, oh!”? – Santa walking backwards!
11. Why does Father Christmas always go down the chimney? – because it soots him!
12. Who looks after Santa Claus when he is ill? – the National Elf Service!
13. Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? – because he had low elf esteem!
14. How many presents can Santa get into an empty sack? – one, because then it isn’t empty any more!
15. How can a snowman lose weight? – wait until it gets warmer!
Beset wishes to all our readers….!
PS if you would like to receive a copy of our newsletter, please leave a message and your contact address in the box below…
Leave a Reply